Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
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