I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Randomize
