I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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