He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
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I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
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Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Randomize