I'm sorry my penis didn't work
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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