Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize