Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach? http://tfl.nu/iba6
  Replies (10) Good night (1296) Bad night (486)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis http://tfl.nu/924d
  Replies (21) Good night (3171) Bad night (680)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table http://tfl.nu/2wbi
  Replies (24) Good night (931) Bad night (3825)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough. http://tfl.nu/u5ru
  Replies (26) Good night (697) Bad night (4092)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (419): We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun. http://tfl.nu/fiqf
  Replies (10) Good night (4351) Bad night (925)
• Favorite

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (901): I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck. http://tfl.nu/z7fe
  Replies (21) Good night (8252) Bad night (861)
• Favorite

  (865): View more from Tennessee

  I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (865): I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only. http://tfl.nu/wjh3
  Replies (7) Good night (2709) Bad night (940)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (614): You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right? http://tfl.nu/6ebj
  Replies (10) Good night (2973) Bad night (979)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux. http://tfl.nu/a54h
  Replies (5) Good night (1864) Bad night (614)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best! http://tfl.nu/yqk0
  Replies (3) Good night (996) Bad night (400)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (406): He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die. http://tfl.nu/b33e
  Replies (3) Good night (791) Bad night (488)
• Favorite

  (787): View more from Puerto Rico

  He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads

  (1-787): View more from Puerto Rico

  Croutons?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (787): He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads (1-787): Croutons? http://tfl.nu/yr5t
  Replies (3) Good night (1483) Bad night (311)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (707): I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical. http://tfl.nu/vu0p
  Replies (2) Good night (879) Bad night (269)
• Favorite

  (706): View more from Georgia

  Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (706): Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit? http://tfl.nu/7qwr
  Replies (6) Good night (1130) Bad night (263)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE. http://tfl.nu/3y8r
  Replies (0) Good night (322) Bad night (184)

Randomize