I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
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