arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
So many bounce houses so little time
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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