i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
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