I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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