So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
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