Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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