you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
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