so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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