Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
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