Texts From Last Night

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  (307): View more from Wyoming

  try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...

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  (307): try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip... http://tfl.nu/dmfu
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.

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  (336): He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters. http://tfl.nu/0ibe
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  (204): View more from Manitoba

  this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol

  (1-204): View more from Manitoba

  you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on

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  (204): this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol (1-204): you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on http://tfl.nu/g8v3
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.

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  (847): Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better. http://tfl.nu/ewir
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  (850): View more from Florida

  you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.

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  (850): you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster. http://tfl.nu/wnb4
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.

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  (412): Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye. http://tfl.nu/918u
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think

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  (304): Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think http://tfl.nu/bm7u
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  (352): View more from Florida

  homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...

  (1-352): View more from Florida

  so you did it...

  (352): View more from Florida

  obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.

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  (352): homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview... (1-352): so you did it... (352): obv...but still...it was inconsiderate. http://tfl.nu/j7x7
  Replies (29) Good night (5710) Bad night (1216)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?

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  (317): So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road? http://tfl.nu/ir52
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .

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  (902): New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever . http://tfl.nu/6kwm
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  (917): View more from New York City

  She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.

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  (917): She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for. http://tfl.nu/k05b
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  (931): View more from Tennessee

  his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood

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  (931): his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood http://tfl.nu/n403
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.

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  (508): He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is. http://tfl.nu/qf8i
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.

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  (330): If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat. http://tfl.nu/hgzf
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  (076): View more from

  He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.

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  (076): He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid. http://tfl.nu/ww4m
  Replies (3) Good night (856) Bad night (122) Order T-Shirt

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