btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
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