I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Randomize
