she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
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