Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
