She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
Randomize