Me too!
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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