Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize