Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Every concussion has its silver lining
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Randomize
