I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
i think i scared a bird with my dick
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
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