what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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