i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
