I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Randomize
