tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
