Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
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Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
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He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
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