you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize