Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
