Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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