Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Randomize