You just made me feel so damn special
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Operation Purity has been aborted
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
