This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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