So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize