i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
