New low: just hacked my moms facebook
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
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