Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Randomize
