Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Come share oat with me in your robe
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
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