David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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