Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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