Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Randomize
