he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
