Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
ttyl tear gas
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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