Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Randomize
