hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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