seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Randomize
