yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
