You can't motorboat a personality
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Randomize
