Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Randomize
